Last year's shorts don't fit anymore. That's a discovery I made before work this morning. It's a hot one in Calgary and I've worn that pair of Levi's faithfully for three, maybe four, summers. I'm not going to lie to you, it stung a bit. And not just because the button pinched my muffin top. I had to face what I've known for a while, but could kind of ignore when I wasn't looking at it, like the mold growing on the tub faucet: I have gained weight in this past year. I looked at myself in the mirror, orange fabric straining against the pressure of belly button and 'bad' decisions, and I thought: "You're fat now. Look how fat and ugly you are." So, I took off the shorts and stared down at the huge pile of unfolded laundry, wondering what to put on my fat and ugly body. I found a pretty dress made of stretchy fabric and I looked at myself again and thought: "Not bad." And then I slapped myself (figuratively) and screame...
hoy·den - /ˈhoidn/ noun (dated) - a boisterous girl